As the old song goes: “Play that chunky soup jig, night Roy.” As my name is Roy and I work the night shift in a soup kitchen, I’ve discovered the meaning of those words more than ever. And while I’ve never been much of a dancer, in that kitchen at night when I’m the only […]
Heartwarming Solar
I’m not an emotional person, usually. I sat through the entirety of Sally McDeal, they got to the part where the guy said the famous “You fulfil me, completely” line, and I just felt…meh. I was hungry, but my girlfriend was in floods of tears, so I thought just removing my arm from around her […]
Renovation Relaxation
Now the doctor is telling me that I need to de-stress because my heart rate is “through the roof” and “I could pass out at any second” and I’m thinking that he doesn’t really understand my situation. I have foreign investors who need status reports on my offshore projects *yesterday*, I need to be up […]
The Buff Reboot
Oh great, they’re rebooting ANOTHER beloved show and apparently butchering it. I was born far too late to enjoy ‘The Buff Boat’, which is all about people on a seemingly never-ending cruise where they learn to get fit, eat healthy, participate in bodybuilding contests and have all kinds of affairs. But I just watched some […]
Seizing Those Opportunities
Life…life is all about seizing opportunity. That’s what it said in the October entry on my Woke Phrase of the Month Calendar, and I’ve been trying to take that to heart ever since. Why, just yesterday I heard a rumbling noise in my car and instead of investigating (which may have closed off that avenue […]
Marine Welding For Girls
I used to love the old ‘Her-Bla’ series, way back in the late 80s when it was airing. Super cheesy now, of course, but there just weren’t many girl superheroes on TV and I was thrilled to find one who wasn’t just some tough action chick with tattoos who’s basically a man. Her-Bla was pretty, […]
Super Perfect Windows
The doors to our Gothic home, as it currently stands, just won’t do. I like many things about our mansion, but there’s plenty of room for improvement. For one thing, there just aren’t enough gargoyles. If we don’t get some gargoyles in there this instant, then we’re getting spirits just all over the place, and […]
Some Big Bugs
Every time I have to swat a fly, I say a little prayer of thanks for the fact that I live in the modern era. I’ve seen dinosaur bones, I’ve seen documentaries about how big things used to be, and so I can’t help but be overwhelmed with gladness. The flies in the prehistoric era […]
Double Air Con Trouble
How am I supposed to keep up with TWO reality TV shows about trades at once? It’s just silly. I know ‘The Great Australian Trade-Off’ has just started and ‘Jack of All Trades’ is in its semi-final week, but it’s just silly. This has to be some kind of scheduling error, especially since they both […]
Honk Honk, It’s Your Neighbour Hank
That’s right, it’s AI Month at the Futurist Club! Always an exciting time, and especially now that we have an entire month dedicated to them. The discussion always seemed to stretch on way too long, so we thought we’d make it official. At least people know what they’re in for. Artificial Intelligence is my favourite […]